Abandon: Living a Cross-centered life.

    April 22nd, 2012 I was reading one of those devotion books. I don't remember which one and usually I'm not a fan of them. But, this particular day God had something for me. A slap in the face. The verse the devotion had me read was Luke 9:23 "And he said to all, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me."" The devotion went on to talk about the word abandon. It said something about the greatest word Jesus ever could have told His people was abandon. I spent the morning thinking about that word. It is kind of a strong word.

a·ban·don/əˈbandən/

Verb:	Give up completely (a course of action, a practice, or a way of thinking).
Noun:	Complete lack of inhibition or restraint.
Synonyms:	verb. leave - relinquish - forsake - quit - give up - desert noun. abandonmen         To completely give something up. It cant be that hard, right? Reality check! It is that hard. Jesus wasn't telling them to abandon just anything. He was telling them to abandon themselves. He expects us to deny and abandon everything. For me this is hard. I have a lot of idols in my life that I put above Him. body image Shopping Movies my family Those are just a few examples. Although it may not seem that hard to let go of these things it totally is. For me the hardest one is the idol of body image and what people think of me. It's always on my mind and I am always wondering what else I can do to look better and be seen as a better person. God is calling me to ABANDON these things. Most of you know that I have a small tattoo on my wrist that says abandon. It is my daily reminder to let go of everything and allow God to lead me. If I want to live a cross centered life everyday I have to pray about it everyday. Its not something that just happens. It is something you have to be proactive about. Taking it one day at a time and releasing your days and worries to God is how its going to happen. Also, being in His word. We cant expect to be able to live this cross centered life and abandon our idols without being in regular relationship with our Lord.  He is the creator of the universe and he has defeated sin. We just have to abandon our idols and sins and give it all to Him. I think one of the first steps for me is realizing that I am a bigger sinner then I dare believe. I cant even fully comprehend how much of a sinner I am. And so are you! And once we realize that, we are able to bask in the FACT that Jesus died on the cross and those sins died with him. We are holy and blameless before Him as believers. "...even as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before Him. In love he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of His will..." Eph 1:4-5 We are adopted sons and daughters and we are called beloved! What an amazing thought. The creator of the entire universe chose YOU and predestined You and adopted You and forgave You and loves YOU! I love you friends and I pray for you and hope this encourages at least one person! I am so encouraged by these gospel truths!

Praising God when its rough.

 Boy! I haven't blogged in a long time. But here it goes...


This week I have been reminded once again how desperately I NEED Jesus. Something I have realized is I don't praise Him in the hard times. Let me explain.
 Paul and I have been going through a rough spot. As you know 5 months ago we had a baby girl. She is amazing. I was scheduled to go back to work when she turned 4 months old. Although I wasn't excited to go back I new it was necessary. So I called my manager to figure out details of my return. That phone called changed everything for us. I was told I don't have a job to come back to. My heart sank. My head immediately went to thinking about how we would pay our bills and buy food and diapers. You see, what I have learned is my reaction should have been to get down on my knees and pray hard and praise God and ask Him what I needed to do next and wait. But that isn't really what I did. I got angry. I couldn't understand why this had to happen to us. And I didn't know how the heck we would buy food. Seriously. I looked at our finances and we had enough from Paul's job to pay bills but that was it. Okay God, how are you going to take nothing and make food? Hmm? This is what I thought. How dare I? Really? The God of all gods. Creator of the universe. The God who feeds the animals of the earth. What made me think that he wouldn't feed me? So, I was angry. But amongst that anger I still prayed to Him for guidance. I didn't have the right attitude but hey at least I was praying, right? Wrong. God's expectation is that we come to Him and ask with complete faith and love knowing He WILL take care of our needs. Well praise Him for being gracious. Even though I had this bad attitude He has provided so far! I am staying home taking care of our kids while Paul works at the church and we have food and our bills are paid. It was until today that I realized that I hadn't thanked Him amongst these hard times. I was driving to the store listening to the Supertones when Jury Duty came on. "You know I haven’t had the best of days but I want to stop and thank you anyway. Cuz every single moment whether sleeping or awake Is your creation And what you’ve made is good I don’t always thank you for the rough days and The hard times in my life
Even though I should." I was convicted. In fact yesterday I had the worst day ever. Today I woke up and just prayed it would be better. Then I heard this song and thought, my gosh I didn't even thank Him for yesterday really. He made the day therefore it is good and I didn't thank Him. Today I am convicted to thank God even in the rough times. 
  I wanted to share this because I know that I am not the only person having a rough patch in life. I have numerous friends going through some very real and very hard issues. I hope that if you read this (You know who you are) you are encouraged and convicted as I was. God is good all the time no matter what kind of a day we are having. We need to thank Him and praise Him every day!


"For it is you who light my lamp; the Lord my God lightens my darkness. For by you I can run against a troop, and by my God I can leap over a wall. This God--His way is perfect, the word of the Lord proves true; he is a shield for all those who take refuge in Him." Psalm 18:28-30